


Sometimes Betty Crocker Knows Best

by kakotheres



Series: Just Write! Fluff Bingo 2019 [4]
Category: Glee
Genre: Baking, Fluff, Great British Bake Off - Freeform, M/M, Short One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-17
Updated: 2019-07-17
Packaged: 2020-06-29 22:32:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,368
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19839856
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kakotheres/pseuds/kakotheres
Summary: Kurt wanted to make a recipe from Great British Bake Off.  Spoiler alert: it did not go well.  Sebastian and Betty Crocker to the rescue.





	Sometimes Betty Crocker Knows Best

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the Just Write! Discord server, Fluff Bingo 2019.  
> Prompt: Baking

“Kurt? Babe? You home?”

Sebastian scanned the living room. He could see Kurt’s messenger bag sitting on the couch, propped up against a few decorative pillows. The coffee table barely visible under piles of notes and sketches. Sebastian recognized a few from one of Kurt’s latest projects for Vogue. Kurt had been struggling for a bit trying to pull a cohesive theme out of the bits and pieces he had to work with. Sebastian hoped he’d managed to make some progress. Kurt’s favorite pair of Doc Martens were neatly stacked in the shoe rack to his left, and his jacket hung from the hook by the door. Clearly, Kurt was home – the question was where. Sebastian dropped his bag down next to the couch as he walked into the living room. He’d deal with his unpacking his law books and notes later, once he’d figured out where exactly his boyfriend was hiding.

“Babe? I’m back, didn’t want to stay at the library any longer. It must be prospie season, there were like ten thousand tour guides talking about shit…” Sebastian trailed off as he walked into the kitchen. In front of him was sheer chaos. The kitchen table was covered in what looked like every bowl, measuring cup, spatula, and pan that they owned. Every surface was covered in flour and what looked like cocoa powder. He wrinkled his nose as the smell of burnt chocolate hit him from over by the stove. “Kurt? You in here?”

“Down here,” Kurt said quietly from somewhere on the floor on the other side of the table. “You’re home early.”

Sebastian quickly crossed the kitchen. “Are you ok? What’re you doing down there?”

Kurt sniffled. His eyes were red from crying, a defeated slump to his shoulders. “Failing at life.”

Sebastian sighed. “Ok, maybe try starting from the beginning of the story.” He reached a hand down to Kurt, pulling him to his feet. He held in a chuckle. Kurt was covered from head to toe in white powder, a smear of chocolate under one eye. His hair stood up in an uncharacteristic ruffled way, like he had been running his hands through it and hadn’t looked in a mirror yet. Sebastian thought he looked absolutely adorable – but he also knew that his temperamental lover wouldn’t appreciate the sentiment at the moment. Biting down on a grin, he pulled Kurt into his arms where Kurt proceeded to bury his face into Sebastian’s shirt. “What were you trying to do?”

Kurt muttered something into Sebastian’s chest.

“Didn’t quite catch that, babe.”

Kurt lifted his head. “I was trying to bake a cake. It’s not going well.”

Sebastian’s eyebrow quirked up. “I can see that.”

Kurt smacked him. “Jerk.”

“Sticks and stones, babe. Ok, so how do we get from ‘I was trying to bake a cake’ to ‘World War III: Kitchen Meltdown Edition’”? 

“It’s all Paul Hollywood’s fault. I was watching The Great British Bake Off, and everything looked so cool and awesome and I decided that I really wanted to try one of the recipes. So, I went to their website to find the recipes and looked for one that sounded good. There was this one chocolate cake one, and suddenly I was really, really craving chocolate cake. I printed it off and gathered the ingredients, and then everything went wrong.”

Sebastian rubbed Kurt’s back, then extricated himself from the embrace and made his way over to the table. He spotted a piece of paper with what looked like a recipe printed on it. He picked it up out of the rubble of broken eggshells and butter wrappings and glanced at the title.

“Rahul’s Edible Rock Garden Chocolate Cake”, he read aloud. He continued to quickly scan the paper. When his eyes fell on one line, he couldn’t help bursting into laughter. No wonder things had gone so wrong.

“What?” Kurt said with a huff. “It looked really good!”

“Skill level: Needs Skill. Seriously babe? This is what you decided to start with? I mean, I know you’re a fantastic cook, but baking is a bit of a different skill set. Maybe start with like…brownies or something.”

Kurt crossed his arms and started to stalk away. “Whatever, I’m glad my suffering amuses you so much.”

Sebastian reached out for him. “Kurt, come on, it’s funny!” He caught Kurt’s shoulder under his hand, gently stopping his forward momentum. “You know I’m absolute shit at anything involving the kitchen. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you.” A year into their relationship and Sebastian still struggled to hit the right tone when it came to Kurt. Hell, it got him into trouble with almost everyone – it’s just that hurting Kurt was the last thing he ever wanted to do. Kurt had already forgiven him for so much.

Kurt sighed and turned back to Sebastian. “No, you’re fine. I just…I just wanted to do something right, you know. My designs aren’t coming together, I couldn’t come up with a good topic for the blog, and I just…I wanted to make something nice, maybe get the creative juices going.” He shrugged. “Instead I just managed to destroy that pan that Carole gave me last year and waste a lot of flour. I think I’m just going to clean up this mess and take a nap. Press the reset button on today.”

Sebastian pulled his dejected boyfriend into another hug, hating how defeated he sounded. He ran his hand through Kurt’s hair, letting the silky strands fall softly through his fingers. “Tell you what. You go take a shower and rest for a bit. I’ll clean up in here and then go pick up a few things. Some stupid cake recipe isn’t going to beat us. I’ve got a plan.”

*****

Sebastian looked up from unpacking the grocery bags as Kurt walked into the newly cleaned kitchen. “How’re you feeling?”

Kurt rubbed a hand over his face. “Better. I should know not to try to take on a new project when I’m already frustrated. It never goes well.”

“Hey, happens to the best of us. You ready for take two?”

“I guess. Did you get what we need? I think I used up most of the cocoa powder in my disastrous take one.”

“Don’t worry – we’re not going to need that because I am a genius,” Sebastian said, stepping away from the kitchen table with a flourish. “Voila. Everything we need.”

On the table sat a box of chocolate cake mix, a can of buttercream frosting, and a bar of dark chocolate. Kurt tilted his head to the side. “Bas? Literally none of that is on the ingredient list. Well, I guess the chocolate bar is. But cake mix?”

“I decided that we should do the training wheels version, since why should our just-for-fun baking be so stressful. So, the plan is to make the cake from the box, slap some canned frosting on it, and then make the dirt crumbles from the recipe. That seemed like the easiest part.”

Kurt stood silently for few seconds, then let a bright laugh bubble out from his chest. “You know what, you’re right. Why make it so complicated? Chocolate cake is chocolate cake. Betty Crocker knows her stuff.” He walked over to the oven and set it to preheat. “So, what’s first?”

“First, I’m going to need a bowl, some vegetable oil, and the remaining survivors of the Hummel Eggpocalypse.”

“Fuck you, Smythe.”

“Anytime, babe. Also, we’re going to need some proper 90’s music to belt out while we’re cooking. No Broadway or showtunes allowed.”

“Just for that, I’m playing nothing but Disney for the rest of the week.”

“You wouldn’t. You know those songs get stuck in my head!” Sebastian opened the lower cupboard and grabbed a medium sized mixing bowl. “I must have watched _Hercules_ like ten million times with my younger cousins.”

Kurt pulled out his phone and pressed a few buttons. “Watch me.”

Sebastian darted from around the table, making a grab for Kurt’s phone. Kurt danced away laughing as the first few notes drifted out into the apartment.

_If there’s a prize for rotten judgement, I guess I’ve already won that…_

**Author's Note:**

> Recipe: https://thegreatbritishbakeoff.co.uk/edible-rock-garden-chocolate-cake/  
> Final line is the opening lyric from Hercules, "I Won't Say (I'm in Love)"


End file.
